I woke up late from bed. A new record, 7 pm.
And I watched some Whiz and some Hilary Duff romantic holiday movie.
Tried to apply. But I'm unreasonably angry, and by this I mean that there's no discernable reason for me to be angry, but I am. And it's not like focused, it's like this ball hiding behind me, hitting me over the head telling me that I'm worthless.
What do you do with unreasonable anger. Surely there's a source. I think it's someone's spirit that's bugging me. Probably the usual suspects.
Maybe it's my dad. He put these spiritual side things on me. I'm not sure what all parts of my body is affected. I do know that I get itchier and feel like theres a wad of pollen sitting on my nose and I can't breath. I don't want him to do things "for me" (for him) anymore. He's sucking out my goodness and I'll be left with whatever he pretends I am. A sad lazy girl. I HATE him. HATE him. I don't know how to deal with it, since he is on my body I end up hating myself.
He wants to take whatever is functional and positive out of me and use it for himself. Can't he just leave things alone. It's not like I'm famous or especially awesome or something. I have a few spiritual gifts but they are waning as his attachments suck the life out of me. I hate everything. I miss Bryan, Derek, and Everyone Else, you guys know who you are. or maybe you don't.
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